tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63871093530987163632024-03-13T19:33:59.160-07:00Building Healthy RelationshipsIts a Relationship blog...Kocee Dykehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01827334906588452662noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387109353098716363.post-17267947540754461862017-08-29T10:32:00.000-07:002017-08-29T10:32:00.940-07:00THE SPACE AND TIME FACTOR IN A RELATIONSHIP? Whats that??<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://images.pexels.com/photos/340566/pexels-photo-340566.jpeg?h=350&auto=compress&cs=tinysrgb" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="350" data-original-width="524" height="213" src="https://images.pexels.com/photos/340566/pexels-photo-340566.jpeg?h=350&auto=compress&cs=tinysrgb" width="320" /></a>Let me guess, someones wondering what this guy is talking about right? lets find out.<br />
So because his your boyfriend, he cant hang out with other girls? because shes your girlfriend she shouldn't hang out with other guys? you know, most times we get so over-protective of the whole relationship issue, forgetting that this people we are with had their lives before we met them, they had people they related with, they had friends, they had family. and all of a sudden you fall from no where and want to automatically colonize, tweak, revise(what ever you want to call it) them. That's perfectly wrong. Sure they should be some changes, but not too extreme. unless of cause they had a kinder crazy life before you, well that should change. My point here is, give them time and space to be with other people they care about in their lives, and not like immediately she says YES, your like in a baritone voice, "don't want to see Guy z, and Guy u around you. you can only see Guy D when am around you, and do call me before you see Guy E." well you should probably give her a timetable on how to run her life or his life. once heard the story of my friends sister, who always<br />
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followed the boyfriend around and even being there when he was hanging out with his close home boys, guess what?... yea, you guessed right, the relationship lasted only a couple of weeks, cause his home boys complained about it, that they didn't have privacy no more, and she didn't really stop, she either asked him what he talked about with his friends or went as far as calling one to tell her what they talked about, he had to use the red button, cause he was tiered of being followed by some monitoring guard in the name of a girlfriend. common fellas, its a relationship not some detention or prison, or some spy mission! she/he needs time apart from you, learn to give them space.. <br />
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They may be like, "baby i want to spend every single second with you", sure that, right there is super romantic but its not good for them neither is it good for you cause you need your own time and space. OK, have you ever been in a room for like 3 days at a stretch without coming out? when you finally came out, what did it feel like? ... i know, you felt like your seeing the world for the first time, right? like you lost track of time? so it is when you <br />
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spend too much time with anyone, be it your girlfriend or boyfriend or spouse. never spend so much time together that you loose track of events around you, or you neglect you personal life. Am not trying to sound selfish but your personal life matters as much as that relationship. so learn to let them be sometimes, let them have fun with other people, it goes a long way to show them you trust them, as well as strengthen the relationship. go to the movies with friends, go shopping with family, spend some independent time and come back and share the gist about the time you spent independently together, it goes a long way to boost the happiness and build<a href="https://nrher.blogspot.com.ng/2017/08/6-things-to-look-out-for-in-any-healthy.htm" target="_blank"> Trust</a> in a relationship.<br />
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Hope you got something, please feel free to share and let others know, you can even share this with your partner, am sure they did love it! and if you did like to contact me, feel free to use the <a href="https://nrher.blogspot.com.ng/p/blog-page_29.html" target="_blank">"CONTACT ME"</a> or<a href="https://nrher.blogspot.com.ng/p/blog-page.html" target="_blank"> "ABOUT ME"</a> tab.Kocee Dykehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01827334906588452662noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387109353098716363.post-68797914854274312182017-08-25T12:00:00.000-07:002017-08-25T12:22:52.063-07:006 things you need to know about being Happy in a Relationship.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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He makes me happy! She makes me Happy! Beautiful and excellent! But wait a minute, do you make you happy? Sometimes we get our head so into this relationship thing that we forget about our personal life. Let's get a few things straight here.</div>
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3 Things you should Never do:</h3>
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<li> <b>Relationships is never the solution to your personal struggles or sadness</b>: people have very awkward reasons for being in a relationship, like: "I just want to date him so that I can find happiness" and that right there is a wrong reason to even start any type of relationship. 80% of the times people do that, they often end up meeting more sadness. 70% of all failed relationships where owing to the fact they were started for the wring reasons. Learn to make you happy.</li>
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<li> <b>Never enter a relationship with an Unhappy person: </b>I agree with people when they say love is all that matters in a relationship, but I can name over a dozen people I have fallen for but never dated, because they didn't meet other standards, either I came to know they are cheats or where moody people (don't really like Moody people) or I discovered they were liers, etc. So also don't date an unhappy person (we often call them sadists) no matter how much you love them. Reason being that they could end up passing down that problem to you and deem your own happiness, and take you away from things that give you joy, and no one wants that right?</li>
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<li> <b> Never make a decision for your own Happiness at the expense of your partners':</b> Don't lord things over your partner, be you the guy or the girl, especially when it comes to matters concerning you two. There should be a level ground. Sure sometimes one can decide to sacrifice their happiness to get through a certain event, but don't do it too often, its never healthy for you.</li>
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<b> 3 Things you should know and practice to reap more Happiness while in a Relationship:</b></h3>
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<li> <b> Your Happiness is more of a personal issue than a mutual issue:</b> </li>
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yes, you heard me right. We too often burden others with the heavy weight of making us happy, everybody's got there own Damn problem, and they are trying to find there way, yes even your partner. You have got to rise to the challenge of finding what makes you happy. I have this friend of mine whom on every 14th February goes to a choicest restaurant in town alone and shows him self some love. Yes! His doing what makes him happy. What's yours? Find out today.<br /><ul>
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<li> <b>Never hold a grudge against your partner: </b>un-forgiveness can go a long way in hindering your personal happiness as well as your mutual happiness with your partner. Whenever you see them you just remember what they did to you and all of a sudden your smiling face flips and so does your happiness. When ever you are wronged, try talking it out with them. Never carry a grudge. Its not worth it.</li>
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<li> <b>Do what you two love doing together:</b> go places where you love together, go watch games together, eat together, go to the movies together. Take turns engaging in activities that make the other person happy cause in doing so, you guys are bringing your personal joy's and happiness to the table and combining it to form one big heart of joy and in turn strengthen your bond. Learn to make you happy, cause you cant give or bring to the table what you do not have.</li>
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Make yourself Happy today!<br />
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Kocee Dykehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01827334906588452662noreply@blogger.com0Nigeria9.081999 8.675277000000051-6.7748435000000011 -11.979019999999949 24.938841500000002 29.329574000000051tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387109353098716363.post-73328917949858720232017-08-23T08:20:00.000-07:002017-08-23T08:20:34.415-07:006 Things to look out for in any Healthy Relationship. <br />
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There aren't too many healthy relationships around these days, inspite of all the billions of relationships around the world. So how do we know when one is healthy or needing help?<br />
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1. <b>Your free to live independently of each other</b>: sometimes we think that because your a couple, you have to do every thing together. Mind you, before him/her, you had your life to live and after them you still have it to live. Sure there has to be some dependence, but not at the things you enjoy doing alone.<br />
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2. <b>Maintaining other relationships</b>: sometimes we think that because you have a boyfriend or girlfriend(or married) every other person of the opposite sex should stay off and that's totally wrong. You should be able to maintain other relationships, hang out with friends, go partying with friends, it doesn't have to be your guy or girl always. Have fun with friends!<br />
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3. <b>Trust should not be a problem</b>: actually, any relationship lacking trust is not far from heating the rocks, and it sure isn't a healthy relationship either. When ever you keep worrying your self when he/she says they are going out with a friend, then there is surely a problem. You should be able to relax and trust each other, when your around them or away from them. Its too much stress doing the spy job!<br />
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4. <b>Your free to make decisions with regards to your life or relationship</b>: it shouldn't be the guy taking all the decisions or the girl. C'mon people! We are in the era of democracy, although I don't mean you should be casting votes before you make decisions but you should be able to come to an agreement of what is good for the both of you at any particular point in time. Also when taking personal decisions, you can involve them but be sure to do what seems right to you, and of course after weighing their opinion along side yours.<br />
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5. <b>Being able to understand and tolerate each other</b>: Like trust, understanding is key. Having in mind you two are two very different people that have an aim, without understanding, you would find your differences always rising to the surface. Sure sometimes, your differences can showup but having them showup too often is never good for a relationship. He doesn't like to watch Disney channel, but you do, You could simply forfeit watching it around him till, maybe when he lives. Or she doesn't like going to a particular restaurant down the street but you do, you can take her somewhere else and go on your own or with some friends later! Its called Tolerance.<br />
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6. <b>Respect for each others 'set boundaries': </b>people come into relationships with a personality and rules that guides their very existence. And that should be treated with respect and not altered unless of cause by mutual agreement. Say he/she decides they don't want to have sex, there should be no pressure from you whatsoever to go against that rule. Actually learning to respect your partners <b>do's</b> and <b>don't</b> goes a long way to say how much you love and respect them.<br />
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So, Having a relationship isn't all that easy, But if you really want to have one, you have to work for it and make sure to keep it healthy. What other things do you think is necessary in building a healthy relationship? Please do drop your comments below.Kocee Dykehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01827334906588452662noreply@blogger.com0Nigeria9.081999 8.675277000000051-6.7748435000000011 -11.979019999999949 24.938841500000002 29.329574000000051tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387109353098716363.post-58564339151330058862017-08-22T15:50:00.000-07:002017-08-22T15:50:09.304-07:00Fighting For Your Relationship... <br />
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Don't get it twisted! Don't think I mean you should go put on your boxing gloves and get ready for a fight, nah its far from that. But what I do mean is making your relationship work.<br />
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Have you ever been in a relationship that eventually crashed? That's because little or no effort was put into it. Just like you have to invest time and money into a business to make it work, same goes for relationships. TIME and EFFORT are key to the success or failure of every relationship.<br />
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When last did you guys spend time together? When last did you Ring them? When last did you send them flowers or a gift? When last did you chat them? If your not able to answer 50% of this questions, then believe me, that relationship is heading for the rocks<br />
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Let's just say He/She stays really far from you, we call that long distance right? But contrary to what people think, distance in 75% of the cases was not the cause for which that relationship hit the rocks, its usually due to Neglect or lack of effort. True you can't speak one-on-one due to the distance But have you tried a video call, sending voice notes or even visit them once in a while?<br />
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Try spending time together, pick that phone and call them, send them gifts, make out time and visit them when possible, show them you care. By doing this your fighting to make things work. If you really value the relationship, forget that the other person doesn't put in much and just do your part. True, it can be discouraging, but thats why its called a sacrifice, it can be tough Bt like I said, its a FIGHT to make it WORK!<br />
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What other things do you think can save a relationship heading for the rocks?? Feel free to comment, and ask your questions too, would be glad to help out!<br />
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Kocee Dykehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01827334906588452662noreply@blogger.com0Nigeria9.081999 8.675277000000051-6.7748435000000011 -11.979019999999949 24.938841500000002 29.329574000000051tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387109353098716363.post-90625548596995177842017-08-21T17:46:00.000-07:002017-08-21T17:46:27.314-07:00The role of Sensitivity and Tolerance in a relationship.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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How many times do you feel like, ahhh! Dad's being so insensitive! or she's being too sensitive! You know? Either ways we always seem to complain, either they are being too sensitive or they are lacking sensitivity, people never get satisfied them, do you?
Well that further stresses the uniqueness of everyone.<br />
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What does it mean to be sensitive? In my own words it means to be emotionally alert and functional. Sometimes, we genuinely make comments, say, to your partner, and you felt like nothing was wrong with the comment, only for you to see tears rolling Down their chicks or they pickup a fight, and your like, What the...! What did I say wrong? That's being over sensitive right? Or sometimes we even classify them as being stupid or as someone who seeks loves conflict.<br />
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Now that's where TOLERANCE comes in. In my words, tolerance is being able to put up with someone's weaknesses no matter how irritating they maybe. You may say; that behaviour is totally intolerable! True! Somethings can't be tolerated, but we have to learn to tolerate what we can do little about.<br />
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I remember having a thing for this girl back then. Only to get close to her and realize, she always had mood swings and also was a very emotional person, sometimes I got really irritated. But from then I learned to overlook her weaknesses and focus more on where she was getting it right, why? Because I saw it as a sacrifice I had to make things work.<br />
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When we start seeing tolerance as a sacrifice and not an opportunity to condone unfavorable behavior, we did find it easier to tolerate.<br />
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Don't get me wrong! Am not trying to support oversensitivity, honestly speaking it can b irritating. But when we learn to see them in the other person as a weakness and learn to correct with love, things did be much more easier, conducive and healthy between you people.<br />
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I believe that a little bit of sensitivity can help spice up every relationship, what do you think? Feel free to live your comments below.Kocee Dykehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01827334906588452662noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387109353098716363.post-70795736502282095042017-08-21T01:07:00.001-07:002017-08-21T06:36:56.011-07:00Healthy relationships?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Finally I get to write my first post! Its a beautiful Monday morning! Can you feel it? I sure can! And the best part of it is, am on holidays and don't have to worry that am running late for school, refreshing, isn't it? Now let's take a look at people who really make holidays fun; what comes to your mind? Family, friends, your date right? That's right and your in are relationship with all these people. How do you make sure this relationships stay healthy? Well that's pretty much what this blog is all about. But just as a way of introduction, what's a Healthy relationship? first what does it mean to be healthy? Note that "health is the state of mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity." This means that a healthy relationship is not one free of quarrels or fights but its one in which despite all odds the persons involved decide to hold on to each other.</div>
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Personally, in my opinion every relationship needs a fight once in a while. It reminds us we are all human and are capable of making mistakes, and that's where tolerance comes in but that's a topic for another day. So let me know, what do you think of conflicts in a relationship and how do you think it strengthens or weakens them? Feel free to comment. Thank you for your time.</div>
Kocee Dykehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01827334906588452662noreply@blogger.com0